Car Spotting

January 10, 2011

I feel your energy suffocating me, your anger bearing down on me, ready to run me over.  Are you trying to tell me something?  I’ve been seeing your car everywhere, though never the same cherry red color, but maybe it’s you, disguised by fresh paint so as not to drawn attention to yourself.  Are you following me?  You always appear in front of me and i make sure never to follow, even if i needed to go in that direction.

I’m not sure i’m ready to begin again.  I don’t know if i’ll ever be ready.  I often imagine what life would be like had we not made that decision.  The one i predicted years earlier would never work.  But you convinced me to try it and we failed.  I still feel your anger, pressing upon me like the air before a rainstorm.   I am still angry at my longing for a destructive relationship, because that’s the only kind i knew.  I was angry it ruined our friendship and now i am baffled by why it doesn’t matter as much as i wanted it to.

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One Response to “Car Spotting”

  1. A Says:

    Hey, don’t worry about it Al. I ain’t mad at you anymore!


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